Greetings

Bonjour (Hello) tout (all) le (the) monde (world),

Translated above, of course, is the word-for-word translation of my salutation.  However, putting tout, le, and monde together becomes "everybody."  Whether or not this blog attains all-the-world status or just the actual translation remains to be seen.  But the journey begins now, my friends.

I am teaching at two collèges (middle schools) this year, after splitting my time between a collège and a lycée (high school) last year.  What hasn't changed is that I have once again been placed in a quartier chaud (hot quarter-->rough area), this time a suburb of Lyon by the name of Vaulx-en-Velin.  Thus, my view of French schooling remains biased, and unless I join a fellow assistant at some point in his or her fluffy, bourgeois school, I may never know that other side. 

As a whole, the attention spans and manners of my students are lacking, which is of course a product of their home life.  But unlike last year, every single class has students who go out of their way to show me that I have their respect, which is key.  In the passing periods, I have my fair share of visitors, coming in to shake my hand or ask me how I am doing in their rudimentary English ("It's good?"), to which I confirm their non-idiomatic habits by responding, "Yes, it's good."  Having exhausted their English supply, they have often ducked out of the room before I can backtrack and take them through a proper greeting.  I do have a tinge of perfectionism to me with regards to the English language. 

Last year, ninety percent of my students were guys, whereas this year I teach plenty of girls.  Thus, it is not uncommon that they come by asking for my "06," these being the first two digits of ten-digit French cell phone numbers.

What's cooler than being asked by thirteen year-old girls for your cell phone number?  Being asked by college girls.

(I was boring myself with all that school talk; let's go, giddyup) 

^^^  That was a segue, folks.  Plenty more where that came from.  ^^^

Beaujolais Nouveau

The scene is Beaujolais Nouveau, which translates to "a big-ass party in which the region of Beaujolais releases their heinous red wine for all (but perhaps mostly tourists) to imbibe."  The date is November 18th.  Being a Lyon second-year man, I scoffed at the drunk Brits scallywaggin' around, buying this overpriced filth.  My drink of choice on this night was Hoegarden, but that's not important (but notice how damn refined I am). 

I'm standing around watching a concert in the street, when I am tapped on the shoulder by my friendly Subway sandwich server, a smiley young lady who was so impressed by my poor French accent that she had just a few days earlier hooked me up with a free sub.  So we're chatting it up, when she introduces me to her two girlfriends.  Now, these two could probably sell a lot of those bogus electric green test tube shooters that young, orange-tinted sorority babes parade around with on trays at Chicago bars.  They are very good-looking.  

So we are chatting, and they are definitely partying more intensely than myself.  As a result, they are getting after it with their English, which is none too impressive.  However, I work with them and nod along, because that's the kind of guy that I am.  One of them, covered in her cloak of alcohol, claims that she will probably be starting school in the U.S. in January, which I rule out because she said "probably," January is less than two months away, and she does not know how to use the future tense.  So, she says she wants me to help her with English, and her sidekick interjects in her thick French accent, "It is no problem if we are two for lesson?"  At this point, the year is 2000, I am a happier James Van Der Beek, and Beaujolais Nouveau is my frat party. 

Such are the perks of being an English speaker in the land of France:  you are a valued resource for those who want to improve their language skills (i.e. you have access to babes), and you may be able to get a free sandwich from time to time.

No feux d'artifice (fireworks) this entry, but those are coming.  Stay tuned.  And welcome back into my life.